Monday, April 15, 2013

Modern Gaming

Based on reviews and my (now waning) love of all things Batman, I decided to buy Arkham City a few months ago when it was on sale for $7.50. With work and life in general being busy at the time, I had yet to download and install it, but now being relatively caught up on the two, I thought this would be the weekend to give it a go.

I'm going to say from the beginning that I have very little love for modern games. Most reviews I read and watch have games with amazing graphics that continue to blow my mind, however I get more and more turned off by the fact that so many of them rely on violence as a means to complete your objective. The latest re-imagining of Tomb Raider seems to be one of the worst of the bunch. Sad, because it looked so promising.

But violence and gameplay isn't what I want to talk about right now. Instead, let's talk about how one starts to play a game in this day and age. We'll start with early Saturday...

1) Login to Steam. I've already bought the game, I just haven't downloaded it. 16 gigs is going to take a while, so I start early.

2) By Saturday evening, Batman is downloaded, but now Steam needs updating. Download and install.

That was Saturday. Fast forward to Sunday night at 9pm when I'm ready to play the game.

3) Steam uses new .Net features, so now Windows needs to update. Download and install. Reboot.

4) .Net already has service packs. Download, install, reboot.

5) Nvidia Experience won't load. Go to Nvidia website, download the new Experience. Install, reboot.

6) Graphics drivers are slightly out of date. Download, install, reboot.

7) Log in to Nvidia Experience to see what settings I can run Arkham City at. Turns out with my new computer I can run Batman at very high quality. Click to run game from Nvidia Experience. Error. Can't load. Desktop game shortcut doesn't work either. What?!

8) Log in to Steam. Click to play. Before loading game I need to install Windows Live gaming. Game loads now.

9) Start screen. Finally ready to play! Nope. Please type the serial number for the game. What? Glad I saw a screen earlier with that info. Copy. Paste. Game continues to load.

10) Finally ready to play! Nope. Windows Live pops up. Enter your credentials. Thankfully I still have my old Hotmail address. Log in. Windows Live now needs to update its software. Install, quit game, continue installation, reboot.

11) Okay. Load up Steam again. Login. Start up game. Windows Live pops up. Enter credentials. ERROR CAN'T CONNECT. So if I keep playing I might not be able to save progress. What?! I was able to login 3 minutes ago! Fine. I just want to play the game. Close window.

Window opens again.

Close window.

Window opens again.

Close window.

Window stays closed. Finally.

12) Main menu. Click to play game. One more error telling me I might not be able to save progress. Fine! Whatever! Just let me play the game.

13) It's now 9:30. Game begins. Swearing, constant violence, sexism, sprinkle in some misogyny for good measure... but look at those graphics!


  1. Ugh. That was hard to even read. Do I dare ask if you'll try to play again or if you're throwing in the towel? -s

  2. Brutal!
    One of the reasons I try to stick to console gaming for the most part.

  3. I think I'd just start smashing things Hulk-style after about 20 minutes of this. You have a lot of patience. It's too much to just wait for a game to load on a console for me these days - never mind a PC.

    Go cartridges!